bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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