BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
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