Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
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