my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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