I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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