My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
