Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
