Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
