OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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