yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
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