THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
