STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I hate all girls vehemently.
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
