About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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