Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
