Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
