3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize