you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
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