i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
