How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Randomize
