Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Randomize
