So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
