your parents love me but you hate me
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
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