Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.