She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.