would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
