So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize