I am in a vortex of obligation.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize
