He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
My bed smells like the plague
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
