Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
