My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize