I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
