SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Randomize
