Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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