Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
