i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
