Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize