I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
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Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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