God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
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