i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
