Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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