walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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