My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
