Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
