Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
