he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
