doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I need to sanitize my soul.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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