Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
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