I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
