ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
and you said cock pushups were impossible
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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