She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I think his dick was bigger than his dog