Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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