I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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